"I AM the Way, the Truth and the Life.
No one comes to the Father except through Me.
If you really knew Me,
you would know My Father as well.
From now on, you know Him and have seen Him."
John  14: 6-7
The Way Of The Lord Ministries
Reverend Noreen T. Kevern
520-237-0329
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The Struggle of Forgiveness

Jesus said, “Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing.”
Luke 23:34

Your forgiveness, Lord, is so easy to accept unto myself, but it is so hard to forgive those around me who have hurt me in some way. Why God do I have such
a hard time forgiving? You did it so easily up there on the cross, when You allowed Your chosen people to kill You. You forgave them while You were up there
on the cross, dying and here I am, unwilling to forgive a careless word, or an action that has caused me so much grief. Why God, do I struggle each day to
forgive those who hurt me, why does the pain of what others have done to me, haunt me to the point that I dwell upon what they did, and in the process, hurt
myself because of my inability to forgive, my hate for another person? Why do I run to You asking You to forgive me, yet seem so unwilling to forgive another?
Lord, why am I not understanding what you mean when You said, “Have faith in God, I tell you the truth, if anyone says to this mountain, ‘Go, throw yourself
into the sea and does not doubt in his heart but believes that what he says will happen, it will be done for him. Therefore I tell you, whatever you ask for in
prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours. And when you stand praying, if you hold anything against anyone, forgive him, so that your Father
in heaven may forgive you your sins. (Mark 11:22-26)

Dear God, that’s so hard, to have that much faith. Just how do I get to have that much faith? I’ve tried Lord, tried so hard to believe that no matter what is going
on around me, to have faith and to trust You enough to not doubt, but God, it just keeps coming through, this doubt, and God, I so want to believe. What must I
do, to have this faith that You speak of, how do I put aside this doubt when all around me is full of trials and I am hurt by those around me? What do You want
of me God? This just seems so impossible and I am struggling. I don’t know where I stand with You, and I feel like I’m a failure because I keep on struggling with
forgiveness, with the trials that keep happening to me. Does this unbelief in my being able to forgive others, myself, and even You God, because I can’t break
past this hurt to forgive?

God, I so want to have faith enough to move mountains but these mountains before me loom so high and I feel so small. I struggle each day, with this faith of
mine. There are moments that I seem to break through and feel that I am able to forgive, but then something happens, the very person that I have forgiven,
once again opened their mouth and hurt me before. Why do You tell me to keep on forgiving them, when they keep hurting me? Why is it always upon me to
offer forgiveness, why can’t they come to me and ask me to forgive them? The want of forgiveness from You is so strong, but the want to forgive others is so
weak. Why Lord, is this? Show me Lord, what I need to do, to change my point of view, to increase my faith. Lord, please help me to increase my faith.

We have all struggled with feeling like this. We have all asked these questions and many still do. Many people hold it inside, afraid to speak these words aloud
for fear that someone will think their faith is weak and they struggle in silence, and in process they begin to feel of sense of despair, of hopelessness and begin
to doubt themselves. We think these words and these feelings cannot be of someone who has faith in God. We hid our weakness and end up not knowing
where to turn or to whom to turn. We don’t want others to know that we have these feelings and that we are unable to forgive.

But God offers us so much more. Jesus said:
“And when you pray do not be like the hypocrites, for they love to pray standing in the synagogues and on the street corners to be seen by men. I tell you the
truth, they have received their reward in full. But when you pray, go into your room, close the door and pray to your Father, Who is unseen. Then your Father,
Who sees what is done in secret, will reward you. And when you pray, do not keep on babbling like pagans, for they think they will be heard because of their
many words. Do not be like them, for your Father knows what you need before you ask Him.
Matthew 6:5-8

Go into a quiet place, and shut the door. God wants you to first build your relationship with Him before you can build a relationship with others. God will teach
you what it means to pray and He will teach you love. That’s really what we need, prayer (talking with God) and love. If we can work on these 2 things to build
our relationship with God, all things will follow. Closing the door puts yourself in private contact with God and there is no one or nothing between you. You have
to learn bit by bit, to put all the other things out of your mind and to actively talk with God.

This morning I was in my room, talking with God. It was a very peaceful talk, we talked about the day, about this Weekly Way that I started a couple of weeks
ago and I asked Him to fill me with the words that He wanted me to say, so I could finish this. We talked about what is going on in my life, and my commitment to
the Lord. It was an active conversation, with me speaking to God and then my silence so that I could listen to God talk with me. When we pray, we don’t want to
come to God with a list, but have a talk with Him about what is going on in our lives. Of course He already knows, but the beauty of prayer is that we are able to
talk with God about our lives. And as in all conversations, there is two-way dialogue, the created and the Creator talking and sharing with each other. God
wants to have time with each of us, one on one. Don’t think that He can’t do it with everyone, we can’t think in His nature, for we are not God, all powerful,
mighty, holy, above all things, Creator of heaven and earth, our Savior, our Redeemer, our Lord and King. It’s a wonderful thing that our Lord wants to be with
His creations and wants us to build a life based on Him.

Life is not going to be perfect but we can work toward be perfect as the Father is perfect. (Matthew 5:48) Prayer is one of the ways that we can learn what God
wants of us. Today God asked me again, if I would go anywhere He sent me, even if it is by myself, and I said yes. I don’t know my road ahead, but I know that
God loves me, and that He will always be with me. No matter what happens in my future, I know that God will see me through. As I was praying, my daughter
came in to tell me that our cat was now gone. Spot was 15 years old and we loved him for 14 years, as he was a year old when he joined our family. We have
wrapped him up in a blanket and will bury him under the trees outside my window. I have already taken my turn at digging the hole. Spot was the only animal to
live with us for so long. We had tried to bring other animals into the home, but Spot would not have any of them, and so we let him rule the roost. We loved him
to the end.

In the end, nothing else matters except love. God is love and that’s what He is trying to teach us. We must learn to love each other, no matter what is going on
in our lives. We have to learn to forgive each other, even if it’s our cat. Spot in the end, taught us what love is, he came and loved us to the end, rubbing up
against us, saying his goodbyes loudly and we knew that his roaming around the house was him looking for a place to die. Let’s not spend time roaming around
our lives, holding to the hurts from our past. Forgive each other, love each other and pray for each other. Talk with God, trust in God, believe in God and have
faith in God. What matters most is not our individual selves but our relationship with the Lord. We have to forgive as He has forgiven. And we have to love one
another as He loves us.

God can move mountains through our faith and God can move our very hearts through forgiveness. When you can forgive another, your prayer time will be so
much more. For when you set aside all the hurt and pain, and let it go, peace flows like a river. Let God’s love and peace flow through you like a river and
cleanse us from all that keeps us away from His perfect love.

“For if you forgive men when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive men their sins, your Father will not forgive
your sins.”
Matthew 6:14-15